I have been in a cranky mood today. I have had very little patience for things and I think that it may have started first thing when I had to drop off Xavier and we managed to make it right on time. When you are on time you are late. I hate just showing up right when you are supposed to, I prefer to be early and have a bit of a buffer. I then proceeded to get a coffee that was subpar. The coffee is something that I have had before, but it was just not good. It is hard to say whether it is the coffee or my taste buds, but it annoyed me. Through out the day there were so many things that annoyed me and every mistake just irritated the hell out of me. By dinner time I was annoyed when the steak did not achieve a great sear. Olivier proceded to tell me that this game he likes is out and can he buy it. I have told him repeatedly he could and was annoyed he kept asking. Xavier was laughing and said my least favorite thing was incompetence. Not just with those around me, but with myself as well. Mel mentioned especially with myself. That is what irritates me the most with cancer is when I feel incompetent and can not do what I normally can. I have never dealt well with incompetence in others as well and it irritates me to no end. It is worse when I am cranky and my tolerance is then much lower for errors. I can be quite difficult at times.
Today it is miracle treat day and Mel had planned for every one to go out and a family, first to go to Sport Chek so she could buy sandals and try and find Olivier clothing he likes. Everything we bought in North Bay he hated. Mel then wanted to go Canadian Tire to pick up some things and then DQ and then home. The kids were whining and complaining about having to go. Remember how I was already irritated. I told Mel to leave them and we can go just the two of us on a date. While we were driving it started to rain harder and we got soaked going into the mall. The AC in the mall was high so I was freezing. We found nothing for Olivier, but Mel found her sandals and off to Canadian Tire. The Triangle app to collect points was not working even though we had used it 5 minutes ago. It happens at times where it just does not work for some reason. That annoys me as well. Off to DQ, it was difficult to enter the parking lot as cars were all lined up for the drive through. I did a bunch of illegal maneuvers and squeezed through to get to the empty parking lot. We are getting our treats and then we will go home. I had meant to take my team out for DQ today but things were a bit hectic and I did not have time.
Growing up, my sister and I were left to fend for ourselves most of the time. My parents worked long hours and I do not ever recall asking them for help of any sort. I think that I would not because my father helping meant that he would teach me things far more advanced than I probably needed to know. It amuses me now how I will get phone calls from him telling me about cybersecurity risks and what I need to look out for so I do not get scammed. He seems quite worried that I am going to somehow get scammed. I guess that i do not know that much about computer things even though he always calls me for technical help with his computer, ipad or phone questions. At times I do not have patience dealing with them as they ask me the same questions over and over and it is difficult to solve for some of those things over the phone. I tell them to bring it to me or I will take a look at it when I go see them. My sister had just sent me a message telling me that my website is down, and when I went to check I see that there is a failure at a data center that is causing sitewide downtime for where I host my content. This was caused because of excessive heat in Phoenix. I think that today is full of small disappointments that will hopefully end tonight and tomorrow will bring a new day.
QHM