May 16th – Tokyo Drift

I started driving this morning and drove for approximately 45 minutes or so so Mel could eat breakfast and to see how I would do. I made sure not to push it too much so that I would not get too tired for the rest of the day. During our drive we were chatting and Mel said that I spend money like water. We were talking and she is debating getting a transportable cup that fits into the vehicle cupholders for her iced drinks. There are some $50 options that she is not sure of. She thinks that I just randomly just buy everything. Xavier defended me and said some of the stuff was essential. Mel said that when it came to the kids that I was overly generous. I grew up where my parents could not splurge so i make up for it now. I told Mel that we could afford it as we had the disposable income. Xavier backed me up and said that if you look good you play good. She said that if Olivier wanted a $200 pair of swim shorts to make him swim faster I would do it without hesitation. She was making these comments because I bought Xavier a bunch of extra gear for his BJJ. They are necessities. She brought up examples of how the school provided track spikes but I insisted on buying my son his own. The ones provided by the school are from beyond my time and are super old and are not great. Though I do admit that for most things that the kids do I like to make sure that they have good equipment and they are prepared. She is right that when it comes to them I am ok with sparing no expenses to give them a good experience. I will spend on them without hesitation while spending months researching things that I want to buy. Growing up Xavier had always had custom goalie gear, while most parents hesitated to spend so much money on equipment that they would grow out of. Xavier always has access to the best equipment that would only last a year with poor resell value. The upside though is he has never had any fear of the puck as he has always had pro level equipment and has never been hurt or had poorly fitted equipment. His equipment has been designed to his specifications and his wild style. I would provide the same freedom for Olivier even though he seems hesitant to ask for things. He is starting to get better about it now but still questions if he can actually get it. There are a lot of stores locally where we shop and I know the owners and workers well. If my kids walked into any of these stores and said my dad will come in and pqy later they would not hesitate to allow the kids to buy whatever they wanted to. They understand, it is important to look good. I always joke that as long as you look good out there I do not care how they play.

When I use to coach track I had some athletes that were not exceptionally talented but we had fun training. One of my best athletes I had known her since she was a child. She was super slow but she had perfect form in hurdles. We use to joke that she would float like a brick. It was beautiful to watch her run because she had great form. She would do well in cities and would consistently make NOSSA because of her form. In races with kids that were faster she would be able to compete and win because she spent more time on the ground and not wasting time and energy going too high over the hurdles. At the higher levels where they could do both she would get slaughtered. Her form was just as good, but she was so damn slow. When training I could lie down and not watch her and know when she messed up by the cadence of her steps. She was a great example of making sure to look good. Look the part and be awesome and if you can not perform well then that is ok.

I appreciate that my parents gave us every thing that they could growing up. We were immigrants in a new country and when you think of what they provided and how we grew up it is impressive. Most parents want to give their kids a better life than they had. Things that they missed out on you try and provide. I never had the best equipment or the best of anything. We did not wear any designer brands or has access to that. Our clothes were based on functionality and cost. I still try and avoid flashy logos or brands that scream for too much attention and focus more on quality. I try and provide quality to the kids because in the longer run it is cheaper to buy good things that last. You remember experiences more than gifts from people. A lot of my fondest memories from a kid are from moments that we did things as opposed to gifts that we received or things that we missed out on. We have given the kids a lot of experiences that they remember now and reminisce on. When we go to Pacific Mall we will recreate a photo that Xavier had wanted. When he was 3 he had wanted a photo in front of a certain wall. We will replicate it this time when we go and compare the two photos. Mel can also see if she can find a glass travel mug as well while we are there.