I am tired. Mel mentioned that yesterday was my first day off steroids that I have been on for 3 weeks. The impact of getting off the steroids is to be expected I think, and now that I know what the trigger is for all of the fatigue it is not too bad. Mel also mentioned that I normally will have a second coffee in the afternoon to help me out and I did not yesterday either. The bus schedule for the schools is not going well as their is a driver shortage and routes are being cancelled. Yesterday when Mel found out that Olivier had his route cancelled she called the school to tell them that he would be picked up. Mel tried to send a message to his watch but he does not always get it. When he was delivered the note from the office he sent Mel a message. He was concerned that something might have happened to me and asked if I was all right. As much as we try and live a normal life and shield the kids from things they understand the seriousness of my current situation far more acutely than I would have anticipated. He is aware that the last couple of days have been rough and the fact that I was hospitalized last week he was concerned. Today it is Xavier’s turn to have his afternoon drop off cancelled so we had to make some alternate arrangements. I received my next chemotheraphy schedule today and it will not be for another 2 weeks which will allow me time to recover at least. The only small concern is that Mel is going to be out of town that week from Monday to Wednesday so she was a bit concerned about how I will be able to manage. She asked me if I was going to have a buddy in the chemotherapy room to help me out with things. I have not considered that far yet as most of my friends work, but if I ask I am sure that someone would hang out. I do not really need help, but the intent is for someone to help me out with snacks and things like that. I have enough friends that work on site that I am sure that If I sent a message to someone that they would help me out. Tomorrow is also our consult with the doctors in Spain so we will see what they have to say about the results and whether they think that I should continue with the treatment there. Based on the results so far, I would want to as whatever they did has had a huge impact. There are some things that we learned that we will be able to accommodate for this time as well. We will bring the injection so Mel can give it to me herself after the treatment is done to help with my WBC. We will also plan to combat the thrush and mouth sores better, because that sucked a lot.
I keep on having people donate to the GoFundMe and yesterday when I was texting with my sister, she wrote something that really put things in perspective for me. There have been some donations of small amounts, and what she said was she appreciated it because people may not be able to give much, but they gave whatever they could because of the cause. It made me think about perspectives quite a bit this morning. It is easy to give when you have excess. Mel and I have consistently donated to different causes without a second thought. I will randomly buy or spend a couple of hundred dollars on a whim as will Mel. Normally anything under a $200 or so we rarely discuss the spending and just buy what we want. We are privileged in the sense that we have the disposable income for that. But if you are on a limited budget and you still want to help out that is far more impressive. I have been blessed that I have had a lot of extremely generous donations, but it makes me appreciate the small donations even more. Some of the small donations are from people that I do not know who they are, but they are willing to help out a stranger anyway that they can. There are so many cases where I have seen people who are down on their luck help out people who are in the same situation. They do it because they understand that you do not always know the circumstances that results in people being in a situation. In these instances, you should not judge and help people out if you can.
The last couple of days, Mel and I have been both stuck in a rut of going through the motions of just surviving day to day. It is the same routine of daily and at night it ia reset for the next day. We will try and do something as a family tonight and this weekend. I use to look forward to hockey, but that is a bit of a mess during tryout and I will not be able to attend the tryouts so I do not get to watch to see how he does out there and I rely on parents to tell me how he is doing. During the day when Mel and I have work it is not bad as we have a purpose, but by the end of the day we are drained by the constant schedule that we have. I think that we will need to resolve that so it is not the same thing over and over again all of the time.
Q