I am not sure if I am catching something from the kids, but today I did not feel great. I have not eaten as much as I normally can and the thought of food is making me nauseous. I ate some this morning and then tried to eat some more this afternoon and struggled with a few bites. We have eaten a lot of fried food the last couple of days and I do not think it is sitting well with me. We do not have much food in the house at the moment so we should go do some grocery runs at some point, but I am not sure when we will do it. Mel received strict instructions from my doctor that indicated that me doing nothing was a medical order. I am not sure that she has complied with that as I had to do some things. I am sure that is why I am not doing great today.
I am not sure if it is fatigue from the weekend or treatment. Yesterday I had friends over for most of the day and we just chilled and chatted and did not do anything strenuous. I had people to engage with though as opposed to today where I did not. Since I was resting it seems that my body shut itself down to fully recuperate. Instead of wasting energy digesting food it decided no, today we will just recover. I took a nap today and I am still tired afterwards. I am sure that the fact that I did nothing contributes to the fatigue today. When you release the tension and you allow recovery is when you are more vulnerable.I spent the day watching an old movie to distract the time. It was not a very good movie but something that I had wanted to watch for a little while. Right now as I am focused on writing my energy levels are definitely increasing as I am now engaged in active thought. I think it reinforces the fact that if you think you are unwell or tired it will manifest itself. Yesterday I refused to be tired since I had people here and I had the mentality that today was going to be a rest day. My body took that as a sign to shut down. I need to change my mindset at times and change what is happening. I can eat bland small portions of food if I am not feeling great. For dinner I made white jasmine rice. It is one of my favorites. Xavier appreciates a bowl of rice and the nuanced flavour. Olivier not as much. He gets sick of rice. We need a new rice cooker and I want to get a new one but Mel says there is nothing wrong with ours. The coating on the inside is all scratched up. I want to buy the Zojirushi platinum infused rice cooker. Mel thinks the price is excessive for a rice cooker. But she is not a connoisseur. I should argue that the dollar store has make-up so why is she shopping at Sephora. I stopped buying myself makeup from Sephora to help save money. The savings to date are unbelievable and are so high you can not even imagine. Think of a number and multiple that by itself and it is still not reflective of the savings. It is that unbelievable, yet she continues to buy makeup. I think I should be able to get the rice cooker. Surprisingly Canadian Tire sells it. She thinks $569 for a rice cooker is excessive when we have a $20 version, but the quality of the rice is not the same. She is not Asian so she does not understand.
Xavier avoided me while he was sick and Olivier right now is making sure we are not in shared space at the same time to make sure that I do not get sick. I appreciate that he understands this and is consciously taking steps to make sure that I do not get sick. He has always been quite thoughtful. I think that I am going into week 3 at a good spot. The fatigue is manageable and I just need to believe that it is not a big deal and eveything will be awesome.
Quoc Hao