I was listening to this song and even with all of the hardships that I have gone through, I would not change a thing. They help shape you and build resilience. I think something that concerns people is wondering if you need help will there be people there to help you out or not. It is something that you hope you will never have to test or encounter. An interesting thing is occurring right now that I thought I would share. This song came up and it made me ponder about uncertainty. There are so many things that I can look back on and reflect if we did this or that differently would we be in the same situation. The next song that is playing right now is called Mayday and it amused me because one of the lines in the song is “help me, is anybody there?” and then transitions into calling out mayday. What amuses me about this is when I have had to pull the help chain I have always had people help me out. I can not think of a single moment in my life where I had to go through some sort of struggle and i did not have help. For that reason alone I would not change a thing. I know that when the chips are down I will always have people that will help me out. My mother-in-law is on vacation this week and she was saddened by the fact that she is not available to help out Mel this week as this scheduled appointment happened out of the blue.
Talking with friends we share a lot of moments and ponder how alike we are. We tend to attract like minded people and those that divert from your ideology are not often kept within your circle. There is also an interesting phenomena that can overcome this though. Time. I have friends that i have known for more than 75% of my life and with those people I consider them family and no matter if we agree on things or not, I know that we will always be there for each other. These are friends that step up when things are tough, when life is hard, unpleasant or not in their best interest. I offered to drive one of Xavier’s team mates if they could not find a ride, and they are quite out of the way for us to go get them. Mel said that she was annoyed me with for this. She knows that this is in my nature to help out, but what she is concerned about is that even when I am not in my best state i will try and help out others and she rightfully thinks that I should be conserving my strength to focus on myself a bit. It may be true, but if someone asks me for hellp I will help them out as best as I can. Mel knows this and appreciates it, but wishes that I would be a bit more selfish at times. I am bulletproof though, or that is the sentiment that I live my life.
I am sure that people are familiar with the common phrase, “梅花香自苦寒来” . It is often written along with plum blossom artwork and the message is the plum blossom’s fragrance comes from the bitter cold. The meaning behind this symbolizes perseverance, integrity and renewal. When times are hard for everyone I am not going to stay sheltered and just think of myself. I will help out others as well.
We just returned from Xavier’s hockey game and boy was it rough. The team as a whole did not play well and Xavier let in some goals that he normally would not have. We were outshot 35 to 11 and 13 to 0 in the third period. When I informed the coaches about this they seemed incredulous that we had no shots in the 3rd. Watching back the reply I confirmed that we had nothing. The coach had mentioned before that he was glad that we had some losses at the beginning and that it was not all easy as it helps to build some resilience. Today was not a case of it. Sometimes the refs may be against you but in those situations you need to just control what you can not give up. Xavier was tired in the third as we were shorthanded almost the entire period. We were penalized 7 times within the 3rd period and were shorthanded for most of it. Whether it is fair or not, I expect my son to steal a win in this situation and for him to carry the team to a win regardless of however the odds are stacked against him. When life tells you that you can not win and it seems like the world is against you. I expect him to make a miracle and beat the odds.
I have stage 4 cancer and we are not sure how bad it is. The prognosis may turn out ok on Tuesday and it may not. It does not matter really as no matter the outcome I need to be willing to fight and persevere regardless of the odds. I am lucky that I have a wonderful network and we are prepping potential contingency plans just in case. Like I mentioned earlier, if things do not go according to plan I know that I can call mayday and I will have people step up. This is what I expect from my son. When the team is drowning and they do not think that they can win, prove everyone wrong. This is what I will model for my son.
Q