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September 15 – All the small things

Posted on 2025-09-152025-09-14 By Q No Comments on September 15 – All the small things

I had to go buy some groceries today for dinner and for lunches tomorrow. As I was entering the grocery store a random guy asked me to buy him food. I declined and went in and bought everything that I needed. As I was heading out in saw him sitting there and I thought, why am I not getting him something to eat. So I told him I would get him something to eat once I dropped off the food in the vehicle. When I came back and I asked him what he wantes. He replied a tub of ice cream. It annoyed me and I did not get him anything. It was hot outside and I am not sure what his plan was. If he asked for actual food I probably would have done it. When I got home I was telling Mel and she said that some of the people have it rough with mental health issues. That people who are in the system and try to help themselves can generally get out with some help.

What it made me think was that it is the same situation with your medical care. You need to want to take care of yourself and it is important that you take all of the steps necessary to succeed. You cannot go through life saying woe is me and expecting handouts or someone else to come save you. People fail during some of the treatments because they are not able to follow the steps or routines. I remember setting alarms throughout the day to do my dental rinse. I ate the same thing for 4 months every morning because it was the only thing I could keep down. I drank 4 protein drinks a day because that was the only way I could get the nutrients I needed. I hated it all. It was a struggle daily. I hated the drinks so much that to this day I struggle with drinking them. Now that I am going back to treatments, it does not matter if I enjoy it or not. I will drink them and do everything that is asked of me because by following the script and doing it gives me the best odds of success.

Mel has started to transition some of the house work to the kids so that they can help out more. I am grateful for all that she does now and for all of the things that she has done in the past. Mel likes to think she is a minimalist but she keeps on expanding her garden more and more each year and bringing in more and more things from the garden. I try and help her out by eliminating all of the food as quickly as possible. So I am doing my part. 

I was watching a video and the people were grilling each other on their memories of their dates initially. Mel and I never try dated. I can not even remember the exact number of years that we have been together. What I found the other day when we were cleaning my office was scrapbooks that Mel made for me when we first started hanging out and dating. She always asked me if I was going to get rid of those mementos and I said no. They are some of my prized positions. This is along side all the cards that my colleagues got me when I first went through treatment. I read the contents and it puts a smile on my face. There were so many kind words from Mel and from my friends. I am grateful for the memories with both Mel and my colleagues. Difficult times strengthens the bonds and I am grateful that I have all of these people in my life.

Gratitude, Random Musings

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