Last week I was quite tired. Over the weekend we had a wedding to attend and Olivier started to get sick. Instead of having the boys at a sleepover we had my brother come and watch the kids and I came home early to take care of him. As a result I have now gotten sick and Mel has avoided it as she spent the weekend helping her parents get ready to move. Talking with Olivier while he was sick was interesting, and he told me that he was not feeling good. I told him that he can just decide to ignore it and think he feels good. He informed me that it was not possible and it made me think about my current situation. Last year while I was actively going through cancer treatment and someone told me I could not do something I would refuse and just figure out a way around it. If I was fatigued or tired, I just decided that I would not be tired and just do what I had to do. There were times that I should have probably rested but I decided that I would do what I had to do. This year I do not try to push myself as much. Mel thinks that I should but I let the fatigue win. I think some of this may be due to my incidences with fainting and now when it hits me it is like hitting a wall so I am much more careful about pushing myself to that point. It is difficult for Mel to move me around on her own so if something happens she would struggle. We always want to give our kids experiences and things that we never had.
As a kid Mel was not a strong swimmer, primarily because she always has to hold her nose when she goes in any water, swimming, bath, shower. The kids take swimming lessons because of this and are both in semi-private with each other right now. It is amusing to watch them do this as Xavier is much stronger being older and bigger, but Olivier really wants to do well in it and tries really hard. He still has some difficulties with listening as his instructor tells him that he must have his hand on the wall when he dunks himself underwater to ensure that he is ok. I never played in the NHL so I would like Xavier to make it. I bought him a stick to play road hockey about a month ago, and he plays hockey for hours everyday by himself and the stick is like a toothpick now. I told him we are just going to buy him really cheap sticks now or plastic road hockey sticks if he is going to play so much and wear them down. When I was his age I had friends to play hockey with everyday. There are kids up the street that ask him to come play hockey with them and he goes on occasion when he is out and they are playing. When playing road hockey though he does not want to play in net and plays out. He does not really want to learn how to play out though and prefers playing goalie.It has been over a week since I had my gastroscopy and I have not heard anything from my doctor as of yet. Normally that is a good sign that they did not find anything as they do not rush to tell “good” news. It has now been over a year since I have had my stomach removed and hopefully most of the cancer.